This month it’s been all about villains. The Joker’, Boris Johnson, Jeremy Corbyn and topical mainstay Donald Trump – like every other month of the year. Only one is acted by Joaquín Phoenix, but they’re all jokers if you ask me.
Luckily, this blog is about a hero. But not just any hero, America’s ass: Chris Evans.
Sorry, Christian Pulisic.
Like a young Captain America, life didn’t begin so brightly for The 21 year old Chelsea winger. Frozen out in the cold and overlooked by manager Frank Lampard, the lightweight American was on fringes for the Blues for the most part of the start of the season, keeping the bench nice and warm. That’s despite his highly anticipated arrival at the club this summer for £58m from Borussia Dortmund. Pulsic had been playing second fiddle to the returning Callum Hudson-Odoi. And Willian, Mason Mount and occasionally, veteran; Pedro.
Lampard insisted that he wanted Pulisic to learn the English game before throwing him in at the deep end, and the forward has been made to wait for his chance having been limited to just a handful of cameo appearances. But his influential second-half introductions against Newcastle and Ajax earned him a starting berth against Burnley.
He more than earned his Stars and Stripes on Saturday evening, though, catching-cold Burnley full-back Matty Lowton, before skinning centre half James Tarkowski with a few neat stepovers and striking home at the far post past a helpless Nick Pope. (Yes, that’s a lot of P’s. But his name is Christian Pulisic so we are absolutely going to play on this alliteration) so post that peach tree of a goal, I was pretty positive that he’d add another.
He did.
His second wasn’t quite as sumptuous, but it would have been just as sweet. James Tarkowski’s astray pass was intrcepted by Willian’s boot and bounced into the path of Pulisic, who surged at the Burnley defence with an Eden Hazard-esque run as Pulsic then struck a low driven effort at goal; ricochetting off a defender to nestle into the net.
A brace in the Premier league is no easy feat, but a hat-trick does trump it. And when Mason Mount whipped one in on the 56th minute, the American rose like a salmon and guided the ball into the top right corner with the side of his bonce. 0-3.
I was the ‘perfect hat-trick’. Right foot, left foot and a header. And with that Captain America made history. He didn’t save the Marvel Cinematic Universe, but he did lay claim to the football universe equivalent – becoming only the second American to bag a hat-trick in the Premier league and Chelsea’s youngest ever hat tricker. (21 Y.O)
While we’re basking in the glory of this hero, let’s also revel in the performances of the other unsung heroes in the game at Turf Moor, too. Jorginho and Kovacic were fantastic in the middle of the park yet again; controlling the tempo of the game, breaking up and starting attacks. And, on the opposing side, who knows what kind of juice Burnley frontman Jay Rodriguez was given before the game as fuel, but he pulled one right out of the top drawer when he hit a 35-yard rocket to bulge the Chelsea net. Kudos to that, even Thanos would be proud.
Lets wind back the clock a week, though, when another hero came to the fore – The Batsman. (Aka, striker Michy Batshauyi). Chelsea crossed Marvel with DC to create the perfect partnership when the duo were substituted on by Frank Lampard in the second half as Chelsea sought to break the deadlock in a cagey affair against Ajax in Amsterdam. They teamed up well when Captain America found space and broke free in the 80th minute and exchanged a neat one-two with the Batsman, but the American blazed wide. Just 5 minutes later though, they were in again. Pulisic danced through the defence and his low cross met the Batsman, who punishd them, cannoning one in off the underside of the crossbar. You don’t give a marksman like the Batsman a second invitation, because he doesn’t make the same mistake twice – not in Gotham, not in the premier League.
Come forth – The BATSman, and Captain America.
Compulsively Human 